My Beautiful Nightmare
by Reef-Shark
Summary: I am sweating; I can feel it running across my brow. A pistol is clutched in my hand, and my teeth chatter, for there is no chance of sleep. Even with the weapon I do not feel safe. You are terror.


**Author's Note: **Anyone who knows me would know that my girlfriend is an aspiring artist who enjoys biomechanics and the work of H.R. Giger, who of course designed the Alien species. She drew a painting of a crouched xenomorph, and called this painting 'My Beautiful Nightmare' and it can be found on deviantart. A year after she did this drawing I decided to write a companion piece to the story as a gift, and am very satisfied with the resulting short story.

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This story is dedicated to Ashley Markley and her painting,

Love you!

**My Beautiful Nightmare**

By Vance Berk

You were born into this world in a pool of gore, and it was at this time that I took you into my care. As I sat back, watching you for days on end I was able to see you grow from that blood stained infant, and I came to realize that you are unlike any other. How you sat in your own little world; you almost seemed as if you were plotting; thinking of some way to break free and take me. Why must you plot against me? I feed, and house you, and yet I feel the apathy of your mind. There is nothing you care for, not even your own existence, and I screamed asking "Why won't you just move and break from your shackles? Why do you not fight for your survival?"

I looked at you each day, sitting crouched beside the walls of your prison and I wondered why it was that you must remain withdrawn in your captivity. It was because of this that I asked "Can you not move, or act out of freewill? Or are you waiting, sitting there; waiting for what is to come. Why is it that I feel you wait for me in this suicide machine that is life?" I knew without doubt you wanted me dead, yet you did not grace me with the courtesy of returning my stare. "Can you even see the world around you? Through your lifeless dome I see what is behind. Is it fear that I see behind that gleam? Can you even see the fear that reflects in my eyes?"

Lifeless. You remained crouched in that corner in such a lifeless manner that you may well be dead, but I knew that this was just a part of your game. You wanted me to be quiet, you wanted me to relax, but I knew I could not lower my guard, even for a second. So long as you lived I could not sleep, and I couldn't retreat into peace. You were just that good of a tease. You teased me every waking moment, and even in my dreams I could feel you prodding my nerves with your mocking silence. Just you and your stillness managed to send dark shivers down my spine. Those were shivers that I couldn't prevent, even with the strongest of medications. Sedatives could not remove your quiet from my busy mind, and I was lost to my imagination that consistently ponders your existence! All you did to destroy me was continuing to sit their crouched, silent, and unmoving.

After watching you sitting there so still, and for so long I found myself unable to think of anything other than you. Every trivial pleasure I had ever experienced, and desired now became second to my thoughts of you. My entire life was now devoted to you, but you never returned my attention. Instead you remained unmoving, ignoring every attempt I made towards communication. When I tried to interact I was rejected, and when I left you alone you'd go back into that state of…nothing.

Eventually the days of waiting took their toll on me and I couldn't take the silence any longer. I got angry at you and began to shout at you from behind the glass, knowing that you could not hear the sound of my voice. "Move, just move, you damned creature of hell! Why won't you just pick yourself up and move? You just sit there, motionless, in a state of grace and peace, but I know it is a simple façade, and I see the wolf beneath the sheep. I am not fooled by your phony front of love, and I do not turn away from your lifeless stare. You do not scare me! I am not afraid of your gleam, and I do not turn from you." It was not true, I did fear you, but I could not admit it, even though I knew you couldn't hear me…But I knew you understood me. "In all your strength you cannot make me fear you, for I know that it is I who am in control."

But I was not in control, for you are no longer in the prison I had constructed for you and I do not know where it is you have gone. Now, alone I shiver beneath the blanket of my bed wondering when it will be that you should come and take me. "When is it that you will silently swoop in and scoop me from my nook and take your time deciding my fate?" was the question I asked myself repeatedly, knowing that you wanted me. Through your silence I had learned that you wanted to wrap your hands around me and send me to eternity.

I am sweating; I can feel it running across my brow. A pistol is clutched in my hand, and my teeth chatter, for there is no chance of sleep. Even _with_ the weapon I do not feel safe. You are terror. What is a simple firearm compared to the power of fear? That ultimate fear that you had filled me with. You, in your quiet, motionless crouch had orchestrated a beautiful campaign of deceit, fear, and beauty. I know now that you were never as simple as I had once perceived, and I know for whom the bells toll. This will most certainly be the end.

I once felt that you were worthless, a creature from hell that was not worth my time, yet here you are, free of your cell, but here I am now, shaking in my bed. I could still feel your lifeless stare, peeling away my defenses and leaving me naked. Once again I ask questions. "Why is it that I am placed under this situation? Have I done you wrong? Everything I do has been for the better, but I suppose you cannot understand that. Please, just stop looking at me in that manner in which you do! I cannot stand your blank stare. Without a face you look at me in an almost human way, and it makes me shiver, for I cannot stand up to the concept of your obvious superiority. Just get away from me and leave me alone to live in my denial! Let me deny you; let me live my life without fear, and without _you_!"

When I finish my pleas I see you gently you ease your way into my quarters, and I shout in futility **more **of my words of fear, wishing that somehow you may grasp their meaning, and slink away back into the shadows from wince you came. "Get out of here! I have done you no harm! Just let me be you damned creature of hell! Let me live in denial, and let me prosper in my ignorance! Just let me go on living in my dream!" I continue shouting as you approach, denying myself all logic in a hopeless attempt to try and preserve my own life. "I have fed and housed you! Let me be, for I have never harmed you!" That was a lie, for by merely keeping you here I had harmed your freedom, and you knew this, and you weren't going to let me escape this.

My cries are ignored, and seem to have no effect on you, bouncing off your hardened flesh as would the round of a child's BB gun. You do not understand my words, and how could you? Us humans are very direct, and are good at communicating with other members of our race, but not with others – we have never been good at foreign relations. Unlike you I could not orchestrate my actions to communicate a message. No matter what I do now I cannot communicate what you were able to by just sitting there in the corner of a polished cell. I am inferior, and you have made it clear with every last motion, and every single step you've taken has brought fear deep into my very soul.

I know even if you didn't understand my words you got my message, and I could tell by your movements that you were going to ignore me and enjoy every second of my demise. A heartless, yet elegant killer you have no pity, especially for those who wish to keep you behind bars. To you I am your greatest enemy, and I must be destroyed for you to confirm your dominance…or maybe it's something different. Maybe you just love the thrill of killing.

You remove my pistol from my hand with ease, and toss it gently across my room. In my fear I had forgotten the weapon that had been clutched in my hand! If I had not stalled I could have broken your skull with a flurry of rounds, and it would be that I could live on. Of course that was never intended to be, and you were not threatened by my weapon, even though you knew I possessed it. You know how powerful a hold you now have over me. The fear you have created. You know what it is you have done, and now you taunt me with it!

Damn you! Damn you for your beautifully orchestrated plan, and damn you for the fear that now grips my heart! If I had only known better, if only I had known what it was that you were capable of doing, but how would I have known? The moment I cast my eyes upon you emerging from your cocoon of carnage you began casting your spell on me, and I was too foolish to see its effects until now. Now, when it is too late for me to do anything to save myself from what you have been planning since your grotesque birth.

You reach out with your hands, and grip me by the sides of my head while I stare into your wet, dripping maw. With ease you pull me from my sheets and hold me up in front of you, with the strength of many men, yet I do not make a sound. I remain quiet, looking at you. For the first time I take note of your body. I notice each muscle, each and every tendon of your maw, the grooves of your body, and that wet shine of that bodily secretion that I may never know the origin of. It is then that I fully understand the perfection of your race, and how foolish I was to try and contain you.

Your claws dig into the flesh of my cranium, and I feel the blood begin to run through my hair. Some of it drips to my ear, slowly running down before form before the droplets bead together at the tip of my lobe before dropping _–plip– _on my shoulder. This is my blood, and it begins pooling on my shoulders, drip, dripping down my ears and onto my torso as you continue to stare down on me.

My heart races, but I remain silent. My silence allows me to live, even if only for a few moments. These horrific seconds are still moments of my life that I want to experience. I want to observe you up close during my final moments. Perhaps you are just as curious about me as I am of you, and you too want to take this time to observe something that until now was behind the safety of a looking glass.

You finally finish your observation, pulling me towards you. Moving yours jaws to the side of my head you softly hiss into my ear, and a shiver jolts down my spine. I know that this will be my end. You move your head back, raising my face to your mouth. Your jaws open and I see inside your gaping jaws, smelling the putrid scent of what is to be my fate. That second set of jaws opens and closes, almost as if it is excited to break through the skull of another victim. It is at this time that I realize nothing I could have done would have saved me from this, for I was doomed the moment I took you into my lab. It is now that I realize what my fear is, and I realize what you are. Before my body goes limp against the floor, I have to say what you truly are.

You stall, your jaws remaining open. It is as if you know that I have something to say, before you crush my skull, and drop my body to the floor to shake in the throes of death. It is the last honor I shall be given before I am embraced by darkness, so I look up at you, and open my mouth, just before the finishing blow is given. I know I only have time to say one thing, and it won't be long. The time for stalling has past, and it is now time to face my end. Taking a deep breath I collect my thoughts, and accept my death as an inferior to you; this majestic being who is superior to me in every way. So it is that I whisper…

"My beautiful nightmare."


End file.
